Domestic violence statistics and victim-blaming

In reaction to my recent blog on Joytika, one of my readers asked me to share the text of my presentation at USP, 24 July 2013 – 'Discussion and sharing space on Domestic Violence', one of the activities that was organized in memory of Joytika. Here it is.

'Reflections on domestic violence statistics and victim-blaming'

Let's try to make sure Joytika is not forgotten. If there is anything positive that can come from this senseless murder, let’s all take a stand and speak out to end violence against women and girls. 

Tapping my experience with violence against women research around the world I would like to share with you some reflections around violence statistics and around victim-blaming.

Violence statistics based on prevalence studies around the world show that on average one out of every three women will experience physical or sexual violence during her lifetime. Most of this violence will be caused by an intimate partner or ex-partner: her husband or boyfriend; someone who is supposed to care for her. Fiji Women’s Crisis Centre (FWCC) found in their study that in Fiji alarmingly twice as many women - or 2 out of every 3 - claimed to have ever experienced physical or sexual violence by the hands of a partner. 

In violence prevalence studies (surveys), the methods we apply to measure how common violence against women is, involve interviewing women using a well-designed questionnaire and especially trained interviewers. In such studies thousands of women in the general population are interviewed; any woman can be chosen, and we do not know in advance if an interviewed woman has experienced violence or not. Confidentiality and safety of the women are central to this work. Names of the interviewed women are not recorded, but their experiences with violence end up in the prevalence rates, the numbers, the “statistics”… Their stories remain anonymous and cannot be traced back to specific individuals....

Unlike the numbers and stories in the study reports, the story of Joytika is not anonymous. Extreme violent cases of women that were killed like Joytika usually make the news. But tragically… Joytika – or any murdered woman for that matter - will never appear in our statistics or in the stories in our reports. She won’t, because she no longer has a voice. When an interviewer would knock on her door tomorrow, she would not be there to be interviewed. When you measure how many women experience violence by using interviews you miss out on those who died. And there are many more who will not enter in our statistics: the women that are hard to reach; those who are hospitalized because of the injuries inflicted to them by violent partners; those who are institutionalized, because of their mental problems after many years of psychological abuse and manipulation; those who are locked up by husband or relatives; those who are not given permission to leave the house or even to open the door and be interviewed by strangers; or those who are too afraid to do so…. And we have no idea how many they are. I want you to remember this when you hear statistics on violence against women: the statistics never include the worst cases... 

I just mentioned that, according to FWCC’s survey statistics in Fiji about two out of three women has experienced violence by a partner in her life. Even more shocking is that in the past 12 months alone, half of these women, or, roughly one out of every 3 women, has experienced physical or sexual partner violence from a partner. If we translate this to this audience, I am quite certain that among the 30 or so women in this group, about ten of you have been slapped or were forced to have sex by a partner in the past 12 months. And remember we can be sure that the reality is even worse than the statistics… we miss the information from women like Joytika… the most severe cases, the women without voice.

The statistics around the world consistently show that if you have experienced such violence you have a higher chance to have health problems, and you have a higher chance that your children perform badly in school or have behavioural problems. Research also shows that your children will have a higher chance to become victims of violence, or perpetrator, or both. What is also shocking is that many of you, like the women in the general population, have probably never told anyone…  Women do not share their problems with others because if your husband or partner finds out that you have been talking about him, he may beat you up again. Or you are afraid that you will not be taken serious, you will be blamed; you know that your neighbours or best friend will say ”you must have provoked him”; your mother will probably tell you that you should be nicer to you husband or that you should stay quiet to not bring shame to the family. This makes you feel isolated and guilty. Research also shows how hard it is to leave, but also that the period around or after leaving is the most dangerous period for a woman.  

For me the most striking finding every time, in country after country is the silence and the stigma and the prejudices…

I do not think I had ever spoken with Joytika, but after her killing, when I went through my photos and videos I found I had photos of her as far back as last year at the premier launch of the movie Suraji (a Fijian movie on indentured cane workers in Fiji). There she was in a stunning black, white and red salwar kameez. I had also photographed and filmed Joytika during a dance rehearsal at YMCA and Joytika dancing on the streets on 14 Febr this year. 

Even if we had been a number of times on the same occasions, I did not get the opportunity to know her personally while she was alive, but I have the feeling I have gotten to know her during the weeks after her murder on 27 June. 

I participated in the tribute for Joytika in the YMCA ten days ago. Afterwards, on my way home I met one of the security guards with whom I often chat. He is a friendly man. He knows my name but I’ve never told him about my work. For some reason I told him that I had just been at a tribute for the girl that was killed. “Henriette” he said in an authoritative manner “let me tell you something. You know nothing about it. I live near the street where it happened. People had heard them fighting, and if a man is angry he cannot control himself.”   

I was taken aback, this normally soft-spoken man sounded so judgemental with his implicit victim-blaming; he implied she should have known her place … and he implied that she drove the murderer to his action. I was so shocked, honestly I could only stammer “If people heard them fighting they should have called the police…”   I did not feel comfortable challenging him further, but… I felt I had failed Joytika then.

I cannot even start imagine the stress that Joytika must have lived under, the burden of the stigma, the prejudices, the forces that wanted her to stay in the relationship, to avoid the shame… And in Fiji there are thousands of women like her; and too many young women are dying…. 

We need to fight victim-blaming, which marginalizes the victim/survivor and make it harder to come forward and report the abuse. It is NOT the victim’s fault or responsibility to fix the situation; it is the abuser’s choice to use violence. Or like I said at the YMCA tribute: Joytika’s murderer is the only person who is guilty of her murder. 

By engaging in victim-blaming attitudes, society allows the abuser to perpetrate violence or sexual assault while avoiding accountability for his actions.

All of us we can do something about this. Here are some suggestions:

• We should challenge victim-blaming statements when you hear them – it is not easy, as I painfully experienced when the security guard confronted me with his victim-blaming;
• We should not agree with abusers’ excuses for why they abuse;
• We should let survivors know that it is not their fault;
• We should hold abusers accountable for their actions: do not let them make excuses for their behaviour, like blaming the victim, alcohol, or drugs or traumatic childhood experiences;
• And we should acknowledge that the survivor is her own best expert and provide her with resources and support.

To conclude, if we are aware of abusive behavior and do not speak out against it, our silence communicates implicitly that we see nothing unacceptable taking place.

Violence, rape, murder – it is never acceptable, never excusable and never tolerable…we owe this to Joytika and all the other women to speak out against it.

Henriette Jansen, Suva, 24 July 2013